Pigeon toed idiot pose

The general oddness of fashion models, or indeed anyone who’s having their photo taken for publicity purposes, is manifest in the very fact that they’re doing it at all.

This is an image issue, and next to nothing else. It’s a simple capturing of visuals with the intention of making the viewer impressed and enticed.

So, when I see the bent leg syndrome, the ‘Polio’ look I am hereby christening it, I’m baffled.

I find it troublingly difficult to ascertain exactly what the purpose of the look is. I have one minor theory, and it’s that they are attempting to appear gawkyly vulnerable.

Now, I’m no expert, but attempting to actively look like a victim, either of a debilitating bone-wasting disease or, perhaps, of a forthcoming abduction, is one that’s passed me by.

It’s such an active and prevalent look too, that it’s clearly become second nature to people. Do they walk like this too? Like they’ve got a club foot? Is that the idea? I’ve not seen anyone wearing one Manolo Blahnik built-up shoe, to give them the full, crippled, effect.

Ah, I don’t know though, do I. This waifishness nonsense may peak, with people getting a leg removed at the knee, or having sleepovers where they take it in turns with blocks of wood and a lump hammer, hobbling each other, like girls in the past piercing their ears, the squares. And, then it’ll pass.

In their older years, when their grandchildren (born via c-sections of course) ask what happened to them, as they lie in their bath-chairs, or prop themselves up on their crutches, they’ll say ‘Oh, it was just a fad. Now, help me over to the vomiting bucket, will you?’